Things You Should Never Say to Your Boss

By Sumit Manwal, Founder, Hospitality Vacancy

One careless sentence can undo months of good work.

Here are phrases to avoid with your boss, and what to say instead.

Planning your next career move in hospitality? Book a 30-minute Hotel Career Guidance Call with me, or browse the latest hotel jobs on Hospitality Vacancy.

Saying the wrong thing to your boss can really damage your career. From refusing to work with a colleague to bragging about your irreplaceability, here are few things you should never say to your boss:

1. "Can you write that down for me?" When you're talking about the details of a project, writing notes to consult later is great. But you need to take them yourself, not ask your boss to do it for you.
2. "I just booked tickets for next month." Never book time off without clearing it with your boss. There might be a major project due that week, or he/she might have approved others to have that time off and therefore need you around. Check with him/her first before you do anything irreversible.
3. "My bad." There's nothing more frustrating than an employee who has made a mistake and doesn't seem to think it's a big deal. When you make a mistake, take responsibility for it, figure out how you're going to fix it, and make it clear that you understand its seriousness. Responses like "my bad" sound cavalier and signal that you don't take work seriously.
4. "I can't work with, him/her." Refusing to work with a colleague is an unusually extreme statement and may mark you negatively. Instead, try something like, "I find it hard to work well with him/her because of X and Y. Do you have any advice on how I can make it go more smoothly?"
5. "I don't know what you'd do without me." No one is irreplaceable, even the head of your company. Statements like this mark you as overconfident, who feels entitled to special treatment ... and will make a lot of other people want to show you that you're wrong.
6. "Do this, or I quit." Whether you're asking for a raise or requesting a day off, don't threaten to quit if you don't get your way. If you don't get what you want, you can always think it over and decide to quit, but if you use it as a threat in the negotiation itself, you'll lose your boss's respect and poison the relationship.
7. "I have another offer. Can you match it?" Using another job offer as a bargaining chip to get your current employer to pay you more money may be tempting, but it often ends badly. First, you may be told to take the other offer, even if you don't really want it--and then you'll have to follow through. Second, even if your employer does match the offer, they'll now assume you're looking to leave, and you may be on the top of the lay-off list if the company needs to make cutbacks. If you want a raise, negotiate it on your own merits.
8. "What's the big deal?" Statements like this are dismissive and disrespectful. If your boss is concerned about something, you need to be concerned about it too. If you genuinely don't understand what the big deal is, say something like, "I want to understand where you're coming from so we're on the same page. Can you help me understand how you're seeing this?"
9. "I can't do this because I need to do that." Don't say that you can't do something your boss is asking of you. Instead, if there's a conflict with another project, explain the conflict and ask your manager which is more important.

10."That's not my job." Protesting that something isn't in your job description is a good way to lose the support of your boss. Job descriptions aren't comprehensive, and most people end up doing work that doesn't fall squarely within that job description. (That's what "and other duties as assigned" means.) You want to make yourself more valuable to your employer, not less.

Manwal

FAQ

What should I say instead of "That's not my job"?

Try "I can help with that; which of my current tasks should I move to make time?"

Your next step

• Students and hotel professionals: Create your free candidate profile on Hospitality Vacancy and browse the latest hotel jobs.
• Want personal guidance? Book a Hotel Career Guidance Call (30 min) and we will plan your next step together.
• Hotels hiring: Register as an employer on Hospitality Vacancy.

Related reading on this blog

• 5 Signs Your Boss Doesn't Rate You (and What to Do About It)
• When Your Boss Misbehaves: How to Respond Professionally
• How to Handle Annoying Colleagues at Work

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About the Author

Sumit Manwal is the founder of Hospitality Vacancy (since 2017) and has 20+ years of experience in hospitality. He received the "Excellence in Hospitality Sector of Uttarakhand" award, presented by Shri Dhan Singh Rawat ji (January 2023), and the Dainik Jagran inext Uttarakhand Ratan Samman for Excellence in Hospitality & Education, presented by Shri Bhagat Singh Koshyari ji (2023). He helps hotels build reliable teams and professionals grow their careers.

📧 Contact: manwal@hospitalityvacancy.com | 🔗 LinkedIn